performance---day 5

1.motive
a.premeditation
2.construction
a.rehearsal
3.act/action
a.false/artifice
b.annunciation
all of these operate under a blanket of depravity (entertainment!).

ive assessed my shots thus far and posted them on youtube. im wondering if these shots are too literal, still.
i do not want to run the risk of being another vita either.
to me, these shots make sense;of course they do. im the artist. theyve always made sense.
i want to take a more universal approach at explaining performance to my viewer. through these shots, my goal is to break down the idea of performance; the motive, the construction and the act.
why do i want to do that? because i want to point out the complexities of performance as a part of the larger picture ('the industry').
i want to emphasize the complexities of the strip club industry and the people involved in it.
why? because i think that dancers deserve more than a simple black or white explanation to such a complicated issue (sex work), which is what i have experienced thus far (its made out to be either all good or all bad, and theres sooooo much more to it than that).
why do i think dancers/the industry deserve more explanation? because i think it might cut down on the moral/social superiority of the outsiders, those who have never had personal and direct experience in sex work, who judge based on what theyre told, not what theyve assessed for themselves.
and no, i dont want to be an activist...but maybe i am.
why is this important to me? because i am involved, i have been there, and i am the one that gets cast aside because outsiders are uninformed. that isnt right or fair.
why the strip club, considering the sex industry as a whole is a multi billion dollar a year industry? i choose the strip club because its what i know. its what i have most experience with, because it means the most to me. i cannot make commentary on pornographic films because i have never been in one. i cannot talk about prostitution because i have never had sex with anyone for an exchange of money. i have however, exchanged money for that FANTASY. i know much about this, and thus have chosen to adopt it as my platform for discussion.

so today is motive/premeditation.
what is motive?
motive implies an emotion or desire operating on the will and causing it to act.
1 : something (as a need or desire) that causes a person to act
premeditation:
premeditation - planning or plotting in advance of acting.

motive/premeditation word association game:
money
attention, bad and good
time management
.....these are all motives for the performance of dancing. what does motive mean?
motive is desire
motive is need
motive is burning
motive is will
motive is therefore, movement
why?
personal gain....what is personal gain?
money
material objects
attention
admiration
perhaps lack of attention
depending on how we perform, we could be seeking nothing at all
justification
validation
need
what do these things look like?
i think of the gym, where we go to work out so that we fit in better, because face it, its not just for you to make yourself feel good.
i think of motivation as something somewhat unreasoning. a stimulus for action.
cannot be controlled.
motive is hunger
motive is moving
motive is water
motive is excercise
motive is food
again, i go back to the material possession. if the two biggest motives for dancers choice to perform is object/financial gain and attention/validation, what do both of those look like, without being obvious?
fire
water
im not sure motivation has a visual representation. i think of looking up from below, because theres something up there that you want. i think about the bunny that greyhounds chase. when i think of motivation, i think of the back story. the waiting part and the fantasy of the attainment of the desired.
being at the bottom of a hill looking up.
propellant.