Next Word of the Week and Final on Performance

Ok, my two weeks of Performance is over. Im waiting for my final two video's to render and export, then ill put them on youtube later this afternoon. I also revamped my phonejacker piece this week. I am going to re-title it. The version 2.0 is much more universal and without the monologue. So, i guess, technically i did three pieces? I have a total of about 20ish video "sketches", not including my raw footage and writing (i havnt put any of these on youtube, theyre mainly collages ive left as final cut files.
Overall assessment: I have 2389935843 hours of footage, 84958439 sketches of videos and a final of 3 videos, only two of which are "allowed" on youtube. Its due today, so im currently uploading. Of all the footage and time i have, i found that im using a total of about 7 seconds of footage between the two pieces. They look very photographic.
The video of the carnival ride represents performance from the perspective of the viewer.
The video of myself in the white seamless and shoes is from the perspective of the performer. This one was originally longer. I revamped this one this week in the studio as well. I was originally going to scrap it, but i feel like its important in the larger "narrative" and the two work well with each other.
Depending on my meetings and critiques, i still might scrap it.
As for Phonejacker, ill have to show that one in class.

Im concerned about my aesthetic. Nothing matches, visually. Is this ok or is it problematic? I can always go back in and edit to make them all aesthetically consistent, thats the easiest thing on earth to solve.

Here are the two Performance finals:






Moving on, today I start my second word. I made a list of words that relate to my idea of conflicting psyche in relation to the sex industry. Ill list some of my words:
performance
frustration
love
hate
confusion
tired/fatigue
sex
gender, specifically "girl"
energetic
anger
loud
talking
selling
buying
lonely
compulsion
lie
truth


I was thinking that my next two studies should be contradictions in and of themselves. My initial thought was to spend two weeks on love and two on hate. Now that i think about it, i think frustration and sex or compulsion are more contradictory to one another in nature. Im mostly drawn to the idea of frustration at this point. Frustration on my part, in that i compromise myself, and my body. Frustration can also be discussed on the part of the patron, in that, they are, theoretically, not permitted to "have" whats on display. For a fee, they can have a simulation of what they could "have". I am frustrated because i feel like i give too much for too little. The customer is frustrated because he doent feel he is getting enough for the amount he is required to pay for his show. This is physical frustration.
This could be further discussed in terms of the mental. The customers existence within the sex industry is primarily as a result of loneliness. He is there because something is somehow lacking and he has to pay for sexual gratification or entertainment. There is much frustration on the part of the customer, because, in my experience, no matter how hard he tries, he is frustrated by the fact that feels he has to be there, or to pay for something that he should get for free.
The performer is frustrated because, primarily, she does not feel she should have to perform in this way for fast and easy income. or any income at all. She is also frustrated because she has to play a roll.
Beyond the surface, both performer and patron know this place is all a lie.
I am frustrated because i give and give and its never enough, more is expected. I am also frustrated because i dont think "this" industry is right or fair and i am frustrated because i feel like i have to be there.
I perceive "you" to be frustrated because you dont feel that you should have to pay for me. "You" are frustrated because you would like to think that youre worth more than purchased company. You are frustrated because you will never get your money's worth. You are frustrated becase...

gotta write more later.